Fleeing Monks

Fleeing Monks
Production Details
Written by	Jeremy Lloyd & Paul Adam
Director	Mike Stephens
Transmission Details
Airdate	19 January 1991
Continuity
Previous	An Almighty Bang
Next	Up The Crick Without A Piddle

Plot

René is not happy, since general Von Klinkerhoffen wants to give him a collaboration medal, but this would make him - the hero of the resistance - very unpopular among the villagers and the resistance girls. It has even gone so far that Edith comes into the café and tells him, that the shopkeepers would not serve her, calling her "the wife of a collaborator" and even the pigeons have dropped their droppings on her. Monsieur Alfonse, who has accompanied her, starts measuring René for his coffin. As René tries to deny the threat he is under, a brick is thrown into the café, smashing through the window, with a note on it saying "Next time our aim will be better". The next moment, Mimi comes in with a parcel for René, which he dare not open. Edith opens it and shows him that it contains a detachable tie, that she has ordered for him. As Yvette comes into the café, with a demand from Michelle to see them in the backroom, René, Edith and monsieur Alfonse go in there.

Michelle gives René another parcel, containing monks' outfits, with which the British airmen are to disguise themselves when the light aircraft from London comes to pick them up. Since there is a curfew in the village, nobody is allowed outside it, except for the monks of the monastery of Saint Crispin the Silent, who are going on a midnight vigil, to celebrate the one occasion when Saint Crispin spoke (he said "Goodbye"). Michelle has brought three monks' outfits - two for the airmen and one for René, who will accompany them to help them find the right field where the aircraft will land. At first, he refuses, since he has enough problems as it is (if he accepts the medal, the villagers will lynch him for being a collaborator and if he does not accept it, general Von Klinkerhoffen will suspect him of working with the resistance and have him shot). However, Michelle forces him by threatening him with a lynching from the resistance, if he does not help the airmen. When she has gone, however, René gets an idea and picks up the parcel with the monks' outfits, leaving the room.

At colonel Von Strohm's office, Helga announces René, who has come to receive the medal. When he enters the office, Von Strohm and lieutenant Gruber are rather surprised to see him dressed as a monk. René tells them that he cannot accept the medal, since he has become a novice monk in the order of Saint Crispin and thus is not allowed any worldly goods. When this does not help to convince the colonel, René confesses that he will be lynched if he receives that medal, which means will not be able to help the colonel and the lieutenant any more. Secondly, his café will probably be burnt down, which means no more evening entertainment for the Germans there - not even having fun with the waitresses. This makes the colonel think again and he and Gruber decide to try to stop the general awarding René the medal. The next moment, general Von Klinkerhoffen enters the room and René disguises himself as best he can under the hood. The general almost recognises him, but as the others cover up for him, he is allowed to leave without the general really knowing who he is. When René has gone, the general first asks for him, but thinks it is just as well, that he is not there, since he has not yet received confirmation from Berlin of the rendering of the medal. Secondly, when captain Bertorelli has come into the room, he notices the new colours of the walls and carpet and complains about it. He wants Von Strohm to redecorate it once again and choose the colours himself.

At Herr Flick's headquarters, Von Smallhausen lets Helga in. She tells them both that René has become a monk. Herr Flick does not think he has done so voluntarily and immediately suspects it has something to do with the British airmen. He therefore decides that he and Von Smallhausen shall enter the monastery to spy and thus, he orders Von Smallhausen to get two monks' outfits for them.

As René is temporarily putting boards across the broken window, he is interrupted by Louise of the communist resistance. After they have had a quick cuddle, she points a gun at him and says she has to kill him. All the girls in the communist resistance have drawn straws to decide who should execute him, since he is a collaborator, and the lot has fallen upon her. However, after René has pleaded for his life, she gives him 24 hours to escape, after which, she will come after him. Thus, she leaves for the time being.

Inside the café, René tells Yvette of this new predicament and she thinks they should escape to England on the plane that is coming to pick up the airmen. Since René is under threat from so many ways, he agrees to this and tells her to go to the police station, contact Crabtree and tell him to ask Michelle for another monks' outfit, under the pretext that the one she has given him is too small. When they have had a quick cuddle and Edith has walked in on them, Yvette goes to the police station and René tells Edith that he is going to England that very same evening. At first, she says she will come with him, but after has convinced her of the need for her to stay behind and run the business, she decides to follow his advice.

Herrs Flick and Von Smallhausen go to the monastery, dressed as monks, and are let in by another monk. They say they wish to join the order and when they have agreed to abide by all the monastery rules, they are forced to hand over all their worldly goods, even their spectacles, which the monk crushes under his feet. Then, they are taken to the scourging room.

At the café, officer Crabtree comes in - from upstairs. He has just delivered the extra monks' outfit and put it under madame Fanny's bed. When he has told René and Yvette this, they take him into the kitchen, where the airmen are washing. Crabtree tells them of the plan, that they will be dressed as monks and at night join the monks' procession out of the village. They will be led by René to a field, where they will be picked up by a plane at exactly midnight. At about a quarter to midnight, they will pass a roadside shrine, which will serve as a landmark for them. In order for them to keep exact track of time, he makes them synchronise their watches and as they have done so, the airmen leave theirs on the table. After they have gone out to hang the washing and Crabtree has also left, Yvette comes up with the idea to set their watches back ten minutes, so they will not reach the plane in time. René decides it is better with 20 minutes, and so, they put their watches back. René then tells her to pick up the extra monks' outfit after he has gone with the airmen and then run to join the procession.

That same night, Edith tells madame Fanny that René is going to England and that she cannot go with him, since she would have to be dressed as a monk and does not have an outfit. Fanny then tells her that there is one under her bed. She urges Edith to take that one and go with René. She and monsieur LeClerc will look after the bar. Thus, Edith takes the costume and leaves, in order to catch up with the procession. The next moment, Yvette comes in and looks for the costume. When Fanny tells her that Edith has taken it, she is determined to run after them, but she cannot get out of Fanny's room, since the door knob comes off as she tries to open the door.

The monks' procession goes by the roadside shrine at a quarter to twelve, but as the airmen's watches only read 25 minutes past eleven, they do not think that is the one and walks on. In the darkness of the night, René does not see, that it is Edith who joins him and, thinking it is Yvette, leads her to the field, where Michelle and her resistance girls put on lights and the airplane lands. The people in the plane, thinking they are Fairfax and Carstairs, quickly pull the two monks into the plan, which immediately takes off. When they are in the air, René discovers that it is Edith and not Yvette who is with him.