|Series||1 to 3|
|First appearance||The British Are Coming|
|Job/Position||Nazi Captain, (later British Intelligence Worker)|
|Portrayed by||Sam Kelly|
He has various characteristics that run counter to the stereotype of a Nazi officer (for example, he is not at all shocked to discover that his uniform is being made by a Jewish tailor). He frequently visits the café.
He is mistaken for a British airman in 'Camp Dance' and sent to Britain. He returns briefly in one episode of series 7, having accidentally become a trusted member of British intelligence.
He is notable for his odd pronunciation of "colonel" which usually sounds like "Colon-Nell" (as if he were speaking French).
Whenever the Germans have to salute the Führer, Geering often heralds him by saying "-tler!", often misheard as "Klop!", instead of the full salute. (In a 2007 BBC special, Kelly says about his character that "Hans was just too lazy to say the whole sentence". The tler-klop misconception likely comes from the fact that it sounds ultimately like “Tlarp!”
Rumours that the actor refused to give the regular salute are false. Indeed, in the second series episode "Herr Flick's Revenge" and the third series episodes "Flight of Fancy", "Pretty Maids All in a Row" and "The Great Un-Escape", the Hans Geering character gives the full "Heil Hitler" salute. Kelly also went on to play Hitler himself in Stalag Luft in 1993.
Hans was born in Berlin, but while still young was smuggled out of the city in a suitcase by his mother, so that his father would not find out about him. Therefore, he was probably an accident. [N 2]
Hans and his mother moved away - presumably to Dusseldorf, where Hans attended school. At one point during his childhood, he grew an avocado plant from a stone on a damp flannel.[N 3]
He possibly could be related to Colonel Von Strohm as in Series 2 (?) he refers to him as "Uncle Kurt" & kisses him after a period of being sent to Coventry to work for British Intelligence.
During World War II
His first appearance was with the Colonel in René's cafe, which they both enjoyed visiting. He was surprised to discover that the Colonel had stolen a priceless portrait of The Fallen Madonna and a Cuckoo clock. Both which they were going to sell on the black market after the war. (AAE: The British Are Coming)
He was escorted by René and the Resistance into the woods where the British plane would land so that they could give measurements for new uniforms (The British Airmen burned the first ones) and the original Fallen Madonna to be copied. Hans and the Colonel were worried to note that their uniforms would be made by Jewish tailors, Solomon and Klein and wished he ordered more shirts. (AAE: Saville Row to the Rescue),
Hans attended the Nazi Officer Staff college. (AAE: The Sausage in the Wardrobe) He also took a course in explosives which he reveals to the others when Michelle announces her plan to blow up the nearby railway line..(AAE: The Execution).
- Last appearance as a regular character. His voice is heard over the radio at the end of Camp Dance
- He reveals this to the Colonel as the reason he suffers from claustrophobia, while they are in the tunnel leading to the RAF POW camp.
- Hans mentions this in response to Monsieur Alfonse's reason for sitting a chamber pot full of earth.