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FMWTBB Helga

Screenshot of Helga looking at the painting

The Fallen Madonna by Van Klomp, also known as The Fallen Madonna with the Big Boobies, is a valuable portrait whose location and genuineness is a key concern to other characters, the original changing hands regularly as well as various fake copies. Early in the series its also referred as The Reclining Madonna.

The Fallen Madonna, among other valuable items such as the Cracked Vase with the Big Daisies, a cuckoo clock and gold bars, regularly recurs throughout all of the series. The paintings are often hidden in sausages or other guises.

To much confusion, no one ever knew who had the original. Fake copies were forged to make one or several characters believe they possessed the real original painting. Once, Herr Flick managed to get hold of three copies and commented: "I have three paintings with six big boobies!"[1]. Numerous times the fake copies were also destroyed, either by accident or purpose[2]. At some point new forgeries were made by Lt. Gruber, because of his "leanings" towards art skills.

Keeping track of the painting[]

Be aware of spoilers.

The list describe where or who is in possessing of the original and its forgeries by the end of each episode.

Episode

Reference

Description Location / Person
Pilot Von Strohm steals the original painting from the Chateau, and passes the painting to René for safekeeping from the Gestapo. Original: Kept in Café René (René Artois).
S01 E01 Hidden in a wall at Café René. Original: Café René (British airman).
S01 E04 Original: Café René (René Artois).
S01 E05 Original: In London.
S01 E07 When returned from London, the original and a forgery (London) are first found by the Communist Resistance. Original: Herr Flick

Forgery (London): Café René (René Artois).

S01 E08 Herr Flick has made second forgery (Flick). Original: Hidden in boots, Flicks office (Herr Flick)

Forgery (Flick): On the wall, Flicks office (Herr Flick)

Forgery (London): Gestapo headquarters (Herr Flick)

S02 E02

Herr Flick disguise the paintings, the original (London) and the forgery (Flick) in two seperate knackwurst.

Original: Cellar, Café René (René Artois)

Forgery (Flick): Kitchen, Café René (René Artois)

Forgery (London): Destroyed (by Herr Flick)

S03 E01 Original: Cellar, Café René (René Artois)

Forgery (Flick): The Communist Resistance.

S03 E02 Original: Cellar, Café René (Marie Recamier)

Forgery (Flick): Destroyed by Gruber.

S03 E03 Original: Café René (Rene Artois)
S03 E04 Original: Café René (Rene Artois)
S03 E05 The original painting The Fallen Madonna is disguised behind another painting (later known as The Cracked Vase With The Big Daisies). Original: The Chateau (Von Klinkerhoffen)
S03 E06 Gruber is asked to make two forgeries of The Fallen Madonna. Original: Ltn. Gruber
S04 E05 Because of a huge mix-up with dynamite, batteries, original paintings and forged paintings; all disguised as sausages, it is impossible to know the location of the original painting of The Fallen Madonna[3]. Original: German HQ (Unknown)

Forgery (Gruber 1): German HQ (Unknown)

Forgery (Gruber 2): German HQ (Unknown)

S04 E05 Original: German HQ (Unknown)

Forgery (Gruber 1): Cafe René (Rene Artois)

Forgery (Gruber 2): Cafe René (Rene Artois)

S05 E06 Original: The Old Sawmill (The Communist Resistance)

Legacy[]

The Fallen Madonna is a fictional painting by the fictional painter van Klomp. The late Lord Bath was a big fan of 'Allo 'Allo!, and in 1992 created an exhibition in his ancestral home Longleat. In return the BBC made a copy of the painting of The Fallen Madonna, which may still be seen today.

Reference list[]

  1. Season 2, Episode 1: Six Big Boobies
  2. Season 2, Episode 2: The Wooing of Widow Artois
  3. Season 4, Episode 5: The Sausages In The Trousers. Only Lt. Gruber know the true identity as he placed secret markings on the original paintings and its forgeries.
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